Three

3 days! It's these last final days before that are the most difficult. Performing is a mind game, and I feel like all my music is prepared and I am totally ready for this recital. And now I wait to perform it. How do I keep energy? How do I keep my practicing interesting? I suppose the answer could be to perform more often in front of others.

I plan to do lots of slow practicing tomorrow. This way I can focus on planning when to put my next left-hand finger down and which notes come next and make sure they're in tune. Tomorrow I am planning to play in Forum (if Aaron can show up?). I will try to focus on being visually attractive and exciting to watch. I will also try to sustain all the syncopated rhythms and make sure that I don't rush anything.

For the Bach, I thought of a word that could "bring me back" if I ever lose my train of thought or start getting side tracked during performance. The word is GRAVITY. This helps me remember to mesh with the strings and go for that full sound all the time. Gravity also helps me remember the overall structure of the piece.

Seven!

One week to go!

My off-campus recital went pretty well last night. At least everyone I talked to enjoyed it. I found that I had trouble concentrating! Maybe it's because there was a big light shining right in my eye literally 10 feet from my face...but I found it hard to control my thoughts and think about the music that was happening in that moment. I often started thinking about what was coming next. So I would close my eyes and try to just think about the music in that moment. I think the Brahms went very well, probably because I used music. :) I was able to be musical and connect my phrases. I was probably most anxious for the Bach, mostly because it's unaccompanied and so long. I had the most memory fumbles in this piece, but nothing too drastic, I was always able to recover quickly. I liked my tone and the pacing and I think I did an okay job of portraying my ideas of structure in the piece. My Liszt etude on the piano went very welll (but this blog isn't about that!). And the Barber was alright, not my best. I was kind of tired by the time I came to this. I had a memory slip in the first movement that I've had before. The second movement was pretty good, but it's slightly my favorite of the three. The third movement was okay, except I had some counting issues. I do think I did an ok job of making it more than just an etude, I was able to play with dynamics and shaping.

Today I'm taking a break from playing, because it's my birthday:)

Eight

I have a performance today. I know I'm ready for it. I performed the Barber 3rd and Brahms 1st movements yesterday in studio class. It gave me a little confidence knowing that I can get through the pieces and the Brahms was actually quite musical. I'm excited for my recital tonight in Columbus. I'm sure everyone will love it, and give me support afterwards. At this moment, however, I would like to clear my mind and try to think about enjoying the music tonight. This is something I am currently learning. Music is emotionally moving, and people do listen to it to get their emotions played with (ending in a preposition is bad!). I want to be able to do this for my listeners. I also don't want to be boring to watch. I want to move a little bit and let the music move me! I will report more on this after the performance...

Eleven

Today (Yesterday) Aaron and I ran through the Brahms and Barber consecutively. There were several sections in each movement that we took note of after the run through. We also rehearsed Barber 3 some more more and I realized that I need to really count around rehearsal 7 and 11.

I also ran through the Bach and had a pretty large memory slip-I had to get out the music. This is ok though, because now I will just be extra attentive at that spot.

Tomorrow I plan to run through the entire program cold. I'll let you know how that goes....

Twelve

I just had a lesson with Amy on Barber 3rd and Brahms 4th. For the Barber Amy said I need to make it musical now, since I have the technical part learned (finally!!). I am to work following the direction of the notes and getting a lighter touch so that my sound doesn't sound so labored--and hopefully will allow me to go faster! I need to crescendo to the tops of phrases especially on that part before rehearsal 5 when I have the ascending line with Aaron. On the last page Amy said I just need to go for it, and that's pretty much all I can do! On the last line I need to make a large gesture on the final Eb upbeat so that it looks exciting even if-God forbid-I miss the last note. I feel somewhat better and more confident about this movement now!! Yay!

On the Brahms Amy said I need to sing along more in my style. I'm chopping phrases to exaggerate the dynamics and it's not good, and not working. So I need to remember to sustain every beat and not simply gloss over notes. Aaron rushes a lot...I guess I rush sometimes, so we need to get that under control.

Yesterday I ran through my entire program again. It went better than the previous day, meaning that I wasn't so tired and flabbergasted at the extensiveness of the program. I feel like I'm at a stagnant point with the Bach, it's not as exciting to play right now, and I think I'm worrying about the tempo too much. Maybe I will have better luck tomorrow!

I'm getting a little more excited for these recitals each day, so that's good! My recital in Columbus is in 4 days--woohoo!

Fourteen

Two weeks from today! I think I'm ready. :) My off-campus recital is in 6 days, so I'm more anxious about that!

I just played through my entire program (with the piano piece I want to play) and it is so long. I guess I didn't realize just how long it was until now. I've decided to play Brahms first, followed by Bach, intermission, Liszt(piano), and Barber.

Today I was pretty much just blown away by the hugeness of the program, so I just tried to think about saving energy as I went, and most importantly, enjoying the music in the moment. It was difficult not to think about future notes, or pieces, and notes that had already happened. I definitely need to play through the whole thing every day.

In Brahms, my intonation was a little off, probably from not playing the piece for a few days. I should concentrate less on vibrato and think about all the phrasing and mood changes I can create with the right hand alone.

The Bach was pretty mechanical today, not very musical. I still concentrate on trying to keep a steady tempo, maybe too much. The last two pages are becoming pretty solid and I think I've worked up a nice peak to the entire piece in the end of the 2nd section (D major section).

The Barber is still my favorite, even though I was pretty tired when I finally arrived to it today. The 3rd movement is still fresh in my memory and at times I worry about falling "off the track", so I think I need to grab some random people into my practice room and play for them, with Aaron, to make it more intimidating with all of the rhythm changes.

Sixteen

So, in my defense, I did blog yesterday-last night, but my laptop battery died and the computer shut down before I was able to post my entry. So enough excuses-16 more days!

Yesterday I rehearsed Barber 3rd with Aaron. We played through it with the metronome several times and eventually I was able to play it through without the music. I just need to do this several more times so I am comfortable playing it from memory in front of people!

Then we ran through the Brahms 1st movement. The tempo is up to performance tempo now, and now I need to remember all the musical elements that I worked on when it was slower.

We also ran the Barber 2nd movement and part of the 1st. With these movements I need to practice what I am going to do when the piano plays without me. I don't want to look distracting, and I want to look like I am enjoying the music while I am not playing. It is pretty much my favorite piece on the program, after all!

Maybe I'll perform some Bach for mom and dad tonight...

Eighteen

Today I rehearsed Brahms 4th and 3rd, and Barber 3rd with Aaron. It's coming together and we just need to get the final movements at a faster tempo! I'm actually getting excited about my recital now :)

The Brahms 4th movement has a lot of syncopation that Aaron and I have to bring out individually. In my lesson today Amy kept referring to molasses and taffy, things that have to be stretched and drawn out. Brahms is like that with his complex rhythms and sonorities. When I play this sonata I think about exaggerating all of the dynamics and making sure to feel every eight note or subdivided note, without making it sound that way.

In the Barber 3rd movement, I am challenged to just keep playing my triplets the entire time while the piano part switches from triple to duple meter, and back again. It's pretty fun to play, but I have to figure out how to block out the piano part so it doesn't throw me off-for now.

I'm going to go practice more, right now...

Nineteen

Today I ran through the Bach. I need to work on what I think about when I'm playing this piece because I get distracted easily. Usually I try to think about the chaccone rhythm and keeping the tempo. I also try to keep the climaxes of each of the 3 larger sections in mind.

Then I ran through the Barber concerto. I worked more on the 3rd movement, with music. It's at quarter=122 now. I just need to feel more comfortable running it with Aaron--then I think I will be able to really enjoy playing this wild movement.

I also worked on Brahms 4th movement. Nothing really exciting here-just waiting to be able to play it faster with Aaron....

Tomorrow is a lesson with Amy and Aaron :) Hopefully it's positive!

Twenty

Wow. I am really bad at updating this everyday. So yesterday I got a lot of work done on Barber 3rd. The whole movement is at quarter=118, so just a bit faster!! I played through the Bach D major section again from memory and was able to bring out the chaccone/bass line more easily by not sustaining so many bass notes.

Goals for this week:

1. Start to play Barber 3rd like a piece and make it interesting with the orchestra accompaniment, not just like an etude. I need to listen to the syncopation from the piano and go with that. This movement is starting to rock, so I just need to have fun with that!

2. Play through the entire concerto starting Wednesday.

3. Work at the middle section in the Brahms 4th movement to get more comfortable with the notes/fingerings. Play through the entire piece with Aaron on Wednesday when we rehearse, hopefully in Souers!

4. Practice performing Bach more in Souers. I need to work with the recital hall space and think about the acoustics that Souers offers and not rush through the endings of phrases. I just need to run through the ciaccona more in Souers.

I am taking a day off today to celebrate Spring Break, but I will definitely try to run through some Barber 3rd and Brahms 4th later tonight... stay tuned!

Twenty Two

Hey twenty 2 more days!!!

Here's what I did yesterday since I forgot to write about it then: I had a lesson with Amy! We worked on the D major section in the chaccone. Amy suggested I not sustain certain bass notes so long so that the chaccone theme can more easily be heard in the bass voice. I really like this suggestion! She also suggested that I think more about the climax of the piece near the end of the D major section -before the d major bariolage section- and change the bowing here so that it resembles the very beginning of the piece and makes the climax that much more important. So today I practiced this middle section with the score and tried to think about these things. I really like these suggestions and I look forward to seeing what more I can do with them tomorrow! I also ran the third and first sections of the piece.

In my lesson yesterday we also touched on the 3rd movement of Barber. Amy and I decided on a tempo marking (quarter= 138) so I feel a lot better about reaching this goal by the end of Spring Break. We worked more on the bow stroke and practicing shifts in slow motion to make sure they happen effectively at a faster speed. Today (Friday) I memorized the rest of the movement! I now know all of the notes, I just have to get the tempo consistent and worked up to 138. This will definitely keep me busy for the next 2 weeks. I also ran through the 1st and 2nd movements and tried to solidify the bowings in the middle of the second movement.

So just incase you didn't see it earlier: The Bach ciaconna and the entire Barber concerto are memorized!! Maybe I can memorize Brahms while I'm at it...

Time to rest. The real work on Barber 3rd starts tomorrow!

Twenty Five

Ok. So more of the Barber 3rd movement is being conquered. The first two pages are feeling pretty comfortable at a fast tempo and the bow stroke is going well. Now I have to kick the last almost 3 pages into gear. I practiced with long slurs today just to see how fast I could get my fingers to go. There are lots of patterns and easy-to-memorize passages in the last 3 pages, so hopefully I can finish memorizing ALL OF IT by Friday--that's the goal!

I also played through the Bach today. I tried to keep a more consistent tempo without a metronome. It took me almost 18 minutes to play the piece. Pretty Awesome. I just need to perform this more and learn what the audience sees/hears when I play it. Will Harvey and/or Amy be able to decipher my "big picture" musical ideas? We shall see.

Also...just got done working on the Brahms 2nd and 4th movements. The 2nd movement is sounding more cohesive and I'm really trying to relax my left hand, play on with flat finger pads in the left hand, and think about shifts before they happen so the musical line is more flowing and not out of tune. The 4th movement is going well, I just need to get it together with Aaron, and up to tempo!

Back from round 2, a.k.a. playing for Harvey in Souers!! I played through the 2nd movement of Barber. He said I need to drag out the beginning more because the piano has such a long introduction that culminates with my entrance. He also suggested that I use my right arm more and basically fling it in circular motion when following through with up-bows. Harvey said I should be more dramatic in my upbows and follow through with the phrases. He also said I should go for the big shifts without care because I am the one with the melodic line. When I finally get to play the tune, I should use more bow (or just practice with separate bows?) to get an idea of how long and drawn out I can make the phrases. I should do the same thing (separate bows) on the super high passage work. Harvey said I had a beautiful sound and that I should make sure my vibrato is always turned on and that I should just make the entire movement slow and passionate and drawn out.

Then I played the 3rd movement of Brahms. Harvey showed me a light, more free bow stroke to start the beginning of the movement. He told me to use my right arm more on the down bow octaves and to pluck up and vibrate on the pizzicatos. Harvey also suggested I stretch out the pleading double-stop melodies and slow down the end section of the movement. This was a great night-thanks Harvey!!

Twenty Six

Ok, So I didn't blog yesterday-oops. Yesterday I worked on Barber. I worked on spots in the 1st and 2nd movements with the music open, just checking intonation and bowings/fingerings. I really need to start performing the 2nd movement so I can explore what to do with all the long phrases. Then I worked for about an hour on the 3rd movement. More memory is coming, but I am a bit anxious of pushing myself too fast to memorize this piece and that it will be done incorrectly. Must keep moving on! I practiced it more in rhythms, and thought about having the next note ready whenever I was playing a note (still looking at the music).

Later I rehearsed Brahms 2nd movement and Barber 2nd movement with Aaron. We hadn't rehearsed for a week so it was good to do a run-through. After the initial run through I mentioned that the tempos dragged a little and we tried to fix that in the second run through.

Twenty Seven

I worked on the 3rd movement of Barber today. I practiced in lots of rhythms and worked some more on memory. My goal is to have it memorized before Spring Break starts next week.

I worked on the 4th movement of Brahms

Twenty Eight

My senior recital is twenty eight days away! It is definitely crunch time! Well, sort of. Here's the repertoire I will perform (get ready!):

Ciaccona from Partita No. 2 in d minor, BWV 1004 by Johann Sebastian Bach

Sonata for Violin and Piano No. 3 in d minor, Op. 108 by Johannes Brahms

Violin Concerto, Op. 14 by Samuel Barber

That's right, Bach, Brahms, and Barber-I actually did think of the alliteration when selecting rep. :) So from here on out, I'm going to try my hardest to write about what I do in the practice room each day until the big day!

Today I began with the 3rd movement of Brahms. Usually I don't practice it slowly, and I just run it through with Aaron. But today I practiced it slowly, and certain sections with running sixteenth notes I practiced in rhythms. I took time to figure out the chords in the sections where Aaron and I have alternating down beats. After about 20 minutes on the 3rd movement I went to the 4th. I am still learning the fingerings in this movement so I'm still practicing it pretty slowly. Then I went to the 2nd movement and ran through it. I need to think more about relaxing my left hand and planning out my shifts so it is more in-tune on the G string.

I have performed the Bach ciaccona 3 times as of now. The 1st time was in studio class in front of 3 students and Dr. Harvey Thurmer. During this performance it was obvious that I was simply trying to remember the notes. I did just that, and now I must concentrate on conveying the larger picture of the piece and what I want the audience to hear and feel when I play it. The 2nd time I performed it was for the Undergraduate Artist Competition. I thought this performance, though incomplete because of time limits, was quite successful. It was very musical and I was able to begin to think about the audience. Performing in Souers was a different acoustic environment than the studio classroom so I will have to play there more to get used to that. The 3rd performance was again Souers, but in front of my studio class again. During this performance, I couldn't seem to turn off my internal evaluator, and it physically showed, on my face and in my hesitating fingers. From this I gathered that I should think about the notes that are happening in the moment, and not on notes that have passed or notes that are yet to come.

Today when I practiced the Bach I was merely trying to get a more consistent tempo for the entire piece. I set a metronome to 45 and tried to play the entire piece at that speed. It was challenging and I realized that my tempos are often inconsistent. I will have to think about this more and decide which sections I intentionally want to push the tempo.

The 1st and 2nd movements are going well. I have performed the 1st several times and now should start performing the 2nd. I have memorized almost half of the 3rd movement but really have to get the rest learned as soon as possible! I think I'll go work on that now...